Is there such a thing as “too fast” in Christian dating?How do you know if a dating relationship is moving too quickly emotionally, or too quickly toward marriage?We have a staff person here who met and married her husband in a matter of months. I hardly knew they were dating before they were engaged.In your experience, in what ways has technology changed the way young people date today? If we are talking about a young man and a young woman who are actively dating, who have defined their relationship, and who know they are in a growing and committed relationship with one another, then I think technology creates an avenue to encourage one another and to connect more frequently.On top of that, my hope would be that young men would seek out older men. The appeal of youthfulness in churches is so heavy and celebrated, and yet I have found, without a good mix of generations, you are going to get lopsided and silly.And the worst possible thing imaginable in my mind is a bunch of 24-year-olds sitting around talking about life.
Personally, I try to do this by having single men into our home. I will help set the table, and then afterwards that young man gets to help me do the dishes.
So, if I think about my daughters, to have a young man constantly texting them and constantly engaging them on social media without any real clear “I’m pursuing you,” any real clear desire to want to establish a shared knowledge of this relationship, I have concerns.
I see a lot of our young women at The Village Church get teased by guys who simply “like” every Facebook post of theirs, or constantly text the young woman, without ever having defined the relationship.
But in a day when so much nominalism passes for authentic maturity, give us a few simple marks of spiritual growth that a man or woman should be looking for in a potential spouse.
I think what you are looking for is seriousness about growth in the person’s faith.